Therapy for People-Pleasing and Boundaries in California
You say yes before checking whether you have the time or energy. You notice a change in someone’s tone and wonder what you did wrong. Even when you know you need a limit, the possibility of disappointing someone can feel difficult to tolerate.
I’m Eunice Lim, LMFT, ATR. I offer online therapy for women in California who want to understand people-pleasing, make room for their own needs, and approach relationships with more choice.
Request a free 20-minute consultation
When caring for others means overlooking yourself
You might soften your opinion, explain a decision repeatedly, or take responsibility for everyone’s comfort. Over time, you may feel resentful, exhausted, or unsure of what you want. It can be hard to recognize a preference when you’re used to asking what other people need first.
These patterns can develop for different reasons. We can explore family expectations, culture, past relationships, and your present circumstances without assuming that caring for others is a problem or that one kind of boundary fits every relationship.
How I help with people-pleasing
Together, we can notice what happens in the moments before you agree, apologize, or step in to fix something. What do you expect will happen if you pause? What feels at stake? Understanding that experience helps us choose steps that are realistic for you.
With IFS-informed parts work, we might explore a part that works hard to keep relationships peaceful and another that feels angry or overlooked. We make room for both perspectives while considering what you need now.
Art therapy can help you see these dynamics in a more concrete way. You might draw the space your responsibilities take up, map the distance you want in a relationship, or create an image of a limit that feels workable. You decide what the image means. No art experience is required.
We may also notice sensations that arise when you express a preference and use grounding to support you as you practice. Our work can include trying language for a request, taking time before answering, or deciding how much explanation you want to give.
Boundaries that fit your life
A first step might be saying, “Let me check and get back to you,” asking for a change, or choosing not to take on an extra responsibility. We can also explore guilt and other people’s reactions without treating discomfort as proof that you made the wrong choice.
The aim is to help you make decisions that consider your needs, values, relationships, and circumstances. We’ll decide together what progress would look like for you.
Online therapy throughout California
Sessions can include conversation, IFS-informed parts work, art therapy, and body awareness. You can decline any creative invitation. Christian faith integration is available only at your request.
Read about my approach, my background, and fees and FAQs.
Explore working together
You can begin with a free 20-minute consultation to ask questions and discuss the support you’re looking for.
Related support: self-doubt and self-esteem · burnout and perfectionism